I wish there were more journalists who wrote with such empathy, Bob. No one will be harder on that young woman than she will be on herself. It's also the case that reporting on criminal cases is frequently one-sided, often feeding the perception of guilt with few of the protections for truth and justice that we've built into the court system. But social media turns this into the near-equivalent of a public hanging. Sometimes the harm from that lasts forever, regardless of guilt or innocence.
As others have noted, it feels strange to "like" such a heartbreaking story. I can only hope the mother didn't see some of the cruel comments directed at her. Really, there's nothing anyone could say that would make her feel worse than she already did. Nevertheless...
It's also likely that not one of those people would've said something like that had they been in the courtroom with you that day. There's something about being behind a screen-anonymous or not- that brings out the worst in us all. And the companies know that keeping us pissed or scared keeps us on the platform longer, which commands higher ad rates. And the circle continues.
Bottom line: This woman lost a child, and FB likely profited from the invective thrown her way.
Social media, like other technology, has grown faster than our ability to address its negative consequences. The worlds of social media is profitable for large and small. However, its costs have been given two contrasting images by your Death by Social Media. Society, in part because of the power of tech, in part because it collides with democratic freedoms, struggles to regulate social media. Regardless of the GNP contributions by social media, what are its costs (harm) to the individuals and families your wrote about.
The last paragraph of your original article really stuck with me: “But right now I’m wondering what the punishment will be for the rest of us who commit less egregious crimes of neglect, as we too spend too much time online, and unengaged in the real world.”
Thinking about when that might have applied to me – whether online, working, or writing. If these boys were radicalized, was that facilitated by less egregious crimes of neglect by their primary care givers or other adults in their lives?
Held my breath at times while reading. I don't know if I feel sorrier for the young mom or the lost, misguided boys. Will think about this all weekend. Thanks a lot Bob!
That makes me think of the inequities in our legal system. This mother went to prison and a man whose child died because he left a gun unattended received 5 years of probation.
Some parts of our society believe in punishment more than they do in rehabilitation. They'd destroy a family to punish someone.
Jan 14, 2023·edited Jan 15, 2023Liked by Robert Leonard
Both motherhood and adolescence are stressful. Unfortunately, social media rewards the outrageous & excessive more often than the wise. Where are the role models?
Bob, as usual you bring your signature compassion to excellent reporting and commentary. As Kathi notes, it is not a story to "like," but a needed story that looks at a situation and an issue from multiple lenses. Social media, like any media, has the power to connect, provide opportunities, and inspire; it can also be tragic distraction or a means of spreading falsehoods or threats. Thank you for raising up that dichotomy in this heart-wrenching piece.
The work of weaving the specific stories of rural America into the fabric of the global movements that shape the future of humanity is important work. Thank you Robert Leonard for doing that work and doing it with such authenticity, grace, and craftsmanship.
I clicked on the like button because I am glad you wrote this story, Bob. But the heart makes it look like I loved it and that doesn’t capture my feelings at all. This story is so sad on so many levels. Thank you for telling this mom’s story with such care and compassion. I pray this mom and her family have found some peace, but we all know that any feeling like peace will always and forever be punctured by this sad story. It is all so heartbreaking.
I wonder, though, if you correctly imagine the reasons for courthouse architecture. I always supposed courthouse architecture was intended to convey that important business, the people's business, was conducted there.
In frontier days, supposedly, and in Lincoln's circuit riding lawyer days, court was held in any available space , even the saloon (bar closed until adjournment of trial). Is the modern county courthouse actually any scarier than being hauled into a small town saloon for the trial of your life?
I would prefer the Marion County courthouse for any case, mine or others', where everyone might feel the inspiration of empathy that you wrote.
Thanks Tom, I appreciate your comments and the reminder of other types of courthouses. My comments on the power of the state reflected in the monumental architecture of our beautiful courthouse is a common conclusion reached in anthropology about monumental architecture in general. It reflects wealth and power--everything from the pyramids to Mar-a-Lago!
I wish there were more journalists who wrote with such empathy, Bob. No one will be harder on that young woman than she will be on herself. It's also the case that reporting on criminal cases is frequently one-sided, often feeding the perception of guilt with few of the protections for truth and justice that we've built into the court system. But social media turns this into the near-equivalent of a public hanging. Sometimes the harm from that lasts forever, regardless of guilt or innocence.
As others have noted, it feels strange to "like" such a heartbreaking story. I can only hope the mother didn't see some of the cruel comments directed at her. Really, there's nothing anyone could say that would make her feel worse than she already did. Nevertheless...
It's also likely that not one of those people would've said something like that had they been in the courtroom with you that day. There's something about being behind a screen-anonymous or not- that brings out the worst in us all. And the companies know that keeping us pissed or scared keeps us on the platform longer, which commands higher ad rates. And the circle continues.
Bottom line: This woman lost a child, and FB likely profited from the invective thrown her way.
Social media, like other technology, has grown faster than our ability to address its negative consequences. The worlds of social media is profitable for large and small. However, its costs have been given two contrasting images by your Death by Social Media. Society, in part because of the power of tech, in part because it collides with democratic freedoms, struggles to regulate social media. Regardless of the GNP contributions by social media, what are its costs (harm) to the individuals and families your wrote about.
The last paragraph of your original article really stuck with me: “But right now I’m wondering what the punishment will be for the rest of us who commit less egregious crimes of neglect, as we too spend too much time online, and unengaged in the real world.”
Thinking about when that might have applied to me – whether online, working, or writing. If these boys were radicalized, was that facilitated by less egregious crimes of neglect by their primary care givers or other adults in their lives?
Held my breath at times while reading. I don't know if I feel sorrier for the young mom or the lost, misguided boys. Will think about this all weekend. Thanks a lot Bob!
That makes me think of the inequities in our legal system. This mother went to prison and a man whose child died because he left a gun unattended received 5 years of probation.
Some parts of our society believe in punishment more than they do in rehabilitation. They'd destroy a family to punish someone.
https://www.kcci.com/article/ankeny-father-sentenced-young-daughter/42475411
Such a difference. Thanks for reminding me.
Both motherhood and adolescence are stressful. Unfortunately, social media rewards the outrageous & excessive more often than the wise. Where are the role models?
Bob, as usual you bring your signature compassion to excellent reporting and commentary. As Kathi notes, it is not a story to "like," but a needed story that looks at a situation and an issue from multiple lenses. Social media, like any media, has the power to connect, provide opportunities, and inspire; it can also be tragic distraction or a means of spreading falsehoods or threats. Thank you for raising up that dichotomy in this heart-wrenching piece.
The work of weaving the specific stories of rural America into the fabric of the global movements that shape the future of humanity is important work. Thank you Robert Leonard for doing that work and doing it with such authenticity, grace, and craftsmanship.
I clicked on the like button because I am glad you wrote this story, Bob. But the heart makes it look like I loved it and that doesn’t capture my feelings at all. This story is so sad on so many levels. Thank you for telling this mom’s story with such care and compassion. I pray this mom and her family have found some peace, but we all know that any feeling like peace will always and forever be punctured by this sad story. It is all so heartbreaking.
Good column, some good comments, Bob. Thank you.
I wonder, though, if you correctly imagine the reasons for courthouse architecture. I always supposed courthouse architecture was intended to convey that important business, the people's business, was conducted there.
In frontier days, supposedly, and in Lincoln's circuit riding lawyer days, court was held in any available space , even the saloon (bar closed until adjournment of trial). Is the modern county courthouse actually any scarier than being hauled into a small town saloon for the trial of your life?
I would prefer the Marion County courthouse for any case, mine or others', where everyone might feel the inspiration of empathy that you wrote.
Thanks Tom, I appreciate your comments and the reminder of other types of courthouses. My comments on the power of the state reflected in the monumental architecture of our beautiful courthouse is a common conclusion reached in anthropology about monumental architecture in general. It reflects wealth and power--everything from the pyramids to Mar-a-Lago!